Reason #10 - They Still Have Their Christmas Lights Up
Reason #9 - More Red Lights Than The Law Allows
Reason #8 - Coalbillies
Without any doubt, the town of Plymouth is the Coalbilly capitol of the world. Now you are probably asking, "What is a Coalbilly"? A Coalbilly is a cross between a hillbilly and a resident of NEPA. You can spot a Coalbilly by his or her lack of teeth, dirty unfashionable clothes and verbal dialect. A true Coalbilly will use words like, hanna (isn't it), dis(this), dat(that), daer (there), dem (them), deess (these) and ain't (isn't). A typical sentence may sound like, "I ain't gonna go down to dat, daer Turkey Hill for a pack of deess here smokes, hanna? 
Coalbillies can also be spotted by the vehicles they drive. Most Coalbillies drive beat up Chevy's or old rotting pickup trucks. In both cases, there is no sign of a muffler. The Coalbilly can usually be seen with the window down and a cigarette in hand while driving. Make no mistake here, when he or she is done with their "smoke", the butt will be flicked out the window with the accuracy of a sharpshooter. The Coalbilly is deadly with a butt at 100 yards! Coalbillies in pickups are also often seen with what appears to be garbage in the truck bed. I say appears, because to them it is gold! They can furnish an entire house from top to bottom from the bed of their pickup truck! Coalbillies can be seen at times lurking in the dark of night outside their home town grabbing old furniture from curb sides. The Coalbilly truck is often painted in multiple colors so it cannot be easily identified by law enforcement.
If you are interested in studying the ever present Coalbilly, just jump in the car and head to Plymouth. I would strongly recommend not to, however if you must, their population is centered mostly around Main Street but can also be found on the side streets. They can be seen here day and night, dragging on a smoke and yelling to their kin folk. A word of caution. Coalbillies have been known to be armed and dangerous.Tomorrow, Reason # 7 To Not Go To Plymouth.
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