Some months ago, the new management for our Scranton / Wilkes-Barre Yankees decided that the team needed a new name. The powers to be came up with the idea that they should have a contest to see what names their fans could come up with. The winner would get 2012-2013 season tickets along with some other prizes for coming up with the winner. Now both you and I know that you should never put this type of decision into the hands of the people of Northeast Pa because all they will do is screw it up. The masses are idiots and they could "F" up a one car funeral. Of course, the management team up there in Moosic are not from this area so they thought they had a winning idea! Let's get the people involved and maybe they will come to watch a game now and then Well, let me just say.....LOSER! Here are the 6 finalists of names that the nitwits of the area came up with and the reason they were picked.
Blast
The Blast combines the over-the-top fun of MiLB with the tough
miners who unearth coal to fuel America's industrial revolution. It's
also the sound of the Yankees of tomorrow blasting home runs
in front of a packed house at PNC Field.
Black Diamond Bears
Paying
homage of the rich coal mining history of the SWB area combined with
the ferociousness of the black bear, no one will want to mess with them
on the field. The natural setting of PNC Field will be the perfect den
for the Black Diamond Bears.
Fireflies
Watch the Fireflies
light up the night sky at PNC Field in 2013. The state insect of
Pennsylvania is a sure sign of summer time in NEPA. Families will have a
glowing good time at the ballpark!
Rail Riders
All aboard!
We’re not just blowing steam with this one. The SWB express isn’t your
ordinary ride on the rails. We’ll be charting our own course as we speed
our way into the minds and hearts of NEPA baseball fans.
Kids can join the Lil’ Conductors Club or you can shop for your favorite team gear at the Station.
Porcupines
This
tough as “Quills” animal is a renegade native to Northeast
Pennsylvania. The fighting, resilient spirit of the porcupine is the
same spirit indicative to our area. With Pulled Porky-Pine Sandwiches,
fans are sure enjoy the fun, creative nature that only Minor
League Baseball can bring to the community.
Trolley Frogs
Known
as the "Electric City," Scranton is home of America's very first
electric trolley car. A trolley frog is not only a mechanical part of a
trolley, it takes us into a creative world of frogs, lily pads and
snapping tongues.
ARE YOU FREAKIN' KIDDING ME! These may be the most idiotic names I have ever seen. We might as well call them the SWB Zipper Heads. I can't believe that the fans along with SWB management could not come up with better names. This is a joke, right? Wrongo beaver breath. It is legit. It is the real deal. What were they thinking when they narrowed it down to these 6 ridiculous names? They were not thinking and that is what the people of NEPA do best. Hell, I could come up with 6 better names and I think I will right now.
The Highlanders
This is the name that I submitted. Back in the early 1900's, the New York Yankees were called the New York Highlanders. This name ties the team to the big Yankees but does not carry the actual name. This is something that Yankee's franchise wanted to accomplish. It also ties the history and tradition of the Yankee's teams to it's minor league affiliate.
The Road Rage
Our area is very well known for its episodes of road rage. You could do a lot with this one especially with the logo on the hats and uniforms. Hell, the team are already carrying bats around.
The Poachers
Our area is also well known for people hunting game out of season. If you are a hunter like I am, you know this to be fact. People are arrested at least a half dozen times a year for poaching deer and bear out of season.
The Guzzlers
This one really sums it up. Us folk here in NEPA can really drink beer.
The Drug Kings
Both Wilkes-Barre and Scranton are being over run by drug dealers so this name would fit. Drug dealers are being arrested at least 2 to 3 times a month. They wait 3 and 4 deep in New York and Philadelphia for their chance to come here to peddle their garbage to the nimrods of our area.
AND FINALLY and MY FAVORITE
The Susquehanna Slippery Nipples
I like this simply because it sounds good.
There you have it, 6 names that didn't make the lame list. I guess if I have to go with one of the actual final 6, I would go with the Trolley Frogs. It has a ring to it and it falls in line with other minor league team names like Mud Hens, lake Monsters, Iron Pigs and Sand Gnats. Of course, I'm sure it will get screwed up and they will pick Blast. Hell, it sounds like a youth soccer team to me. The big decision comes in November. We can have a good laugh going into the holiday season.
Comments
Post a Comment